Navigating the pain of stillbirth
The impending birth of a child can be a time of happy anticipation and planning. But when the pregnancy ends in stillbirth, a person’s world is shattered. The experience is not rare – in the United Kingdom, for example, about nine babies are stillborn every day. When this horror happened to BBC journalist Fiona Crack, she channeled her grief into a chronicle of her journey and those of five other women with some hope and optimism.
“My arms ached. I thought I had a blood clot, but the doctors told me it was normal – a biological response to the shock that there was no living child for me to hold. I sobbed. My milk came through, marking my T-shirt, and I was too exhausted to be embarrassed,” Ms. Crack wrote.
There came a year of first events that would never be shared with her child, Willow – Christmas, Mother’s Day, and the dreaded first birthday. Slowly she mustered resolve. She also connected with five women around the United Kingdom who had faced the same horror.
Some solace has been found. But the scar will always remain. “Over the past year, my need to remember and memorialize Willow has jostled with my need for self-preservation. A year on, grief can still occasionally floor me, slicing behind my knees, but I can feel it coming and I can prepare, knowing I can survive its brief but powerful kick. Willow’s birth made me a Mum and Tim a Dad. My arms no longer ache like those first hours, but they are still empty. I am a mother without a baby,” Ms. Crack writes.
In the United States, about 24,000 stillbirths are reported each year, research shows. Mindfulness therapies have been shown to reduce posttraumatic stress symptoms among women after experiencing stillbirth.
Polygraph tests and employment
Jobs are not always easy to find. Once employed, there can be fear that job security is transient, as well as pressure to please the employer. How far is too far in efforts to gain this pleasure? An article on the BBC website explores the issue.
In some countries, including the United States, the issue is theoretical, since polygraph testing of employees is illegal. But elsewhere, such as in South Africa, there is no legal protection. And polygraph testing has been used in Kenya for prospective politicians. According to polygraph expert Doug Williams, polygraph testing is fallible and is mainly used as a means of intimidation.
“It’s a psychological billy club that coerces and intimidates a person into a confession. It scares the hell out of people. I would never work for a company that requires polygraphs because they’re starting the entire relationship off as an adversarial proceeding,” Mr. Williams said in an interview. The presumption of distrust can be toxic to a workplace.
“If most employees agree to take a lie detection test, then there would naturally come to be some suspicion of those who refuse to take it,” says Nick Bostrom, PhD, ethics professor at the University of Oxford (England). “Refusal would send a bad signal – it suggests you have something to hide.”
In a world where personal information can be just a few mouse clicks away, the issue is worth thinking about.