Commentary

Finding Purpose in Retirement

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As I write, it’s Black Friday and I’m reflecting on three distinctly different events that occurred yesterday: Thanksgiving, the first day of Hanukkah, and my birthday. Two of them will not converge again in our lifetime (one calculation suggests Thanksgiving and Hanukkah will not coincide again for 77,000 years!). As for the birthday, well … while I was not actually born on Thanksgiving, that’s the day my family has always traditionally celebrated. The festivities got me thinking: Now that the years are really adding up, what am I going to do with the rest of my life?

I recall hearing that question several times in my youth. My response was usually: “I don’t know.” Of course, that changed once I realized my calling to the nursing profession. But I’m starting to hear the question again now, with a completely different implication, and my answer remains the same.

Looking back, I realize that at age 30, what I thought I would do at 60 or 70 was not realistic. To begin with, I didn’t think I would live to see those ages. They seemed so far off—not so much anymore! That I have a 99-year-old aunt, a 97-year-old uncle, and an 88-year-old father (the baby of his family) suggests to me that I am going to be around for a while longer. So I guess, like many of my contemporaries, I should start preparing for retirement, which means having goals—and a plan to achieve them—in place.

Financial readiness is usually listed as the primary goal for retirement. I agree; that concept has been drummed into our heads since our first day of work. However, while financial security is important, I am finding that being “ready” is more than a matter of finance. Being mentally and physically prepared is the bigger and more important challenge. You can have all the money in the world, but without the energy and interests that extend beyond your work career, you risk being (dare I say it?) an old curmudgeon!

In the past few months, I have been in the company of several people who are well into their 80s and 90s. While their knees and hips may limit their full mobility, they have not let that stop them in other dimensions. Their mental acumen is amazing. Conversations with them about past and current events (with a comparison of today to yesteryear) are intriguing. Their discussions about politics, religion, and presidential administrations are often heated but always cogent.

The trait these people have in common is that they stayed socially connected after leaving the workplace. Each of them has a hobby or some other activity that keeps them mentally alive. Some volunteer at a library, a local child care center, a thrift shop, or a hospital. Whatever the activity is, it gives them the motivation to get up, get out of the house, and interact with the outside world. One woman, who volunteers at a “senior center,” says she enjoys helping the “hardly able.” She, meanwhile, is 96!

Several of these people, while their spouse was still alive, were clear: The key to successful retirement is a social life that includes activities as a couple and as an individual. They were adamant that I do the same!

Keeping physically active is another commonality among my new companions. For them, every day includes exercise of some sort and fresh air. One couple in particular takes daily walks. They developed the habit when their children were young and they wanted “a few minutes alone.” Today, only two things keep them from their daily stroll around the neighborhood: ice and wind gusts. On those days, they walk on their enclosed patio (with the windows open).

I know two women, both in their late 70s, who have been friends since college. They and their husbands shared travel and other events as couples. While both husbands have passed on, the women continue to travel, play golf or cards, or do something else every week. Their social lives have continued despite the loss of their spouses. They attribute their “youthfulness” to staying active and having their health.

Staying in good health (to the extent it is in our control) is also essential to an enjoyable retirement. Our generation has the advantage of advances in science that afford us a longer life, but it is up to each of us to do our part in staying healthy. Keeping active will serve us well in our golden years. Building an activity into each day now, regardless of whether we are still working full-time, becomes a routine that is good for our body and our mind. I recently “booked” a walk into my daily calendar. It is a great reminder for me to keep that commitment, because getting outdoors is good for my physical and mental health.

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